[ the screeching nearly does him in - juno is a lady with a delicate constitution and this body horror is really, really making him uncomfortable. he feels his stomach flipflop, and nearly goes jibbery over it. ( praise him, he's holding it together for shirou. ) ]
So, you bleed. And also swords?
[ yes, that is the sentence structure he uses. so - explain this, because he's really trying to wrap his mind around it. the swords are real, he'd felt the flat of one under his fingertips, before he'd remembered how badly this entire situation was giving him the heebie-jeebies. this whole thing is - yeah, it's weird. ]
Um. Not usually. The other times... I just passed out. I think. Without the swords, I mean. I bleed normally... normally.
[ "the other times" meaning a brief memory of grabbing saber's hand and pulling her away from a corpse come back from death, the explosion after -- and then the pain before he blacked out and woke up at home, uninjured. ]
I'm okay, Juno-san. Really.
[ you are in the hospital and 30% composed of swords after you nearly got eaten, child no youre not okay. if you just freaked out a little more, even that would be more okay than how calm you are about this. ]
[ can shirou even remember? their memories are faulty, in this place, prone to being twofold ( one lie, one truth: good luck figuring out which is which ) and he knows that if he can't trust certain recollections, shirou probably can't either. ]
I dunno, nothing's ever tried to eat me before. [ shirou's fingers of his real hand try to knot themselves in the sheets, but instead simply slip on the metal of the gurney, his gaze distant once again. there's things he's known about himself since the last time he woke up in this hospital that have never changed, but its trying to fit everything else in around them that is so hard. like a part of him just wants to be happy, and is resisting looking over the edge at what might be deeper down inside.
but memory is a slippery slope, and like the grip he cant seem to find on the gurney, he can't stop himself from trying to give juno a true answer. ]
I've dreamed about the swords, though. And...
[ shirou's pause is longer, his gaze even more distant, and thinks about waking up in the hallway in a pool of his own blood. the sensation of a spear thrust right into his heart, splitting his panicked breath in half. it was right over his heart — right there, a vertical puncture wound. he can almost feel it, just thinking about it, and unconsciously starts to reach for the phantom injury. instead of a pierced heart, all he finds is a thin cut on his palm as he thoughtlessly touches one of his own swords, the new pain sharp against the dull, constant wave in his chest and arm for only a second. almost missed. he hides the cut in a balled up fist, but still, he can feel the blood starting to seep against his fingers.
finally, he looks back up at juno, eyes bright, brow furrowed. ]
I... I think— I was killed, once. It kind of felt — feels like that. But all over, instead of just in one spot.
[ plenty of things have made attempts at eating him; a client or two, for the ratings. a beast made of rows and rows of grinding gears, like teeth that were ready to churn meat and bones into butter. a rabbit, once. that was before he'd learned how to deal with their ilk, through bribery. one of the monsters that had invaded the town, most recently, before he'd wedged his gun between his throat and its mouth, and blown enough holes in it to make it flinch back. that one, however, he wouldn't tell shirou. he wouldn't tell nureyev, either. nobody needed to know - he'd made it out fine, after all.
shirou reflects on something, and juno tries to reach for that wandering, still-flesh hand of his before it hits blade, before it is cut up as well. he's too little, too late, but he stuffs his fingers into the palm of shirou's hand all the same and tugs it away from the network of swords that poke through his injuries. the blood, in this volume, doesn't make him as woozy, but the feel of it pooling - warm and slick - forces him to lower his head for a moment, tucking his face between his knees.
he doesn't let go of shirou's hand. ]
Don't... make it twice, then. [ what the HELL is this kid ] I need you around.
[ juno tugs on shirou's hand, trying to draw his attention. trying to drag him out of his own head. ]
I've known a lot of people who've... died and gotten hurt, I don't want that happening to you. Not on my watch.
[ 'killed', though. now he looks painfully uncomfortable ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
So, you bleed. And also swords?
[ yes, that is the sentence structure he uses. so - explain this, because he's really trying to wrap his mind around it. the swords are real, he'd felt the flat of one under his fingertips, before he'd remembered how badly this entire situation was giving him the heebie-jeebies. this whole thing is - yeah, it's weird. ]
You know, I can get a nurse if you're in pain.
no subject
[ "the other times" meaning a brief memory of grabbing saber's hand and pulling her away from a corpse come back from death, the explosion after -- and then the pain before he blacked out and woke up at home, uninjured. ]
I'm okay, Juno-san. Really.
[ you are in the hospital and 30% composed of swords after you nearly got eaten, child no youre not okay. if you just freaked out a little more, even that would be more okay than how calm you are about this. ]
no subject
[ can shirou even remember? their memories are faulty, in this place, prone to being twofold ( one lie, one truth: good luck figuring out which is which ) and he knows that if he can't trust certain recollections, shirou probably can't either. ]
You don't have to be.
[ "okay" ]
I wouldn't tell anybody, if you weren't.
no subject
but memory is a slippery slope, and like the grip he cant seem to find on the gurney, he can't stop himself from trying to give juno a true answer. ]
I've dreamed about the swords, though. And...
[ shirou's pause is longer, his gaze even more distant, and thinks about waking up in the hallway in a pool of his own blood. the sensation of a spear thrust right into his heart, splitting his panicked breath in half. it was right over his heart — right there, a vertical puncture wound. he can almost feel it, just thinking about it, and unconsciously starts to reach for the phantom injury. instead of a pierced heart, all he finds is a thin cut on his palm as he thoughtlessly touches one of his own swords, the new pain sharp against the dull, constant wave in his chest and arm for only a second. almost missed. he hides the cut in a balled up fist, but still, he can feel the blood starting to seep against his fingers.
finally, he looks back up at juno, eyes bright, brow furrowed. ]
I... I think— I was killed, once. It kind of felt — feels like that. But all over, instead of just in one spot.
no subject
[ plenty of things have made attempts at eating him; a client or two, for the ratings. a beast made of rows and rows of grinding gears, like teeth that were ready to churn meat and bones into butter. a rabbit, once. that was before he'd learned how to deal with their ilk, through bribery. one of the monsters that had invaded the town, most recently, before he'd wedged his gun between his throat and its mouth, and blown enough holes in it to make it flinch back. that one, however, he wouldn't tell shirou. he wouldn't tell nureyev, either. nobody needed to know - he'd made it out fine, after all.
shirou reflects on something, and juno tries to reach for that wandering, still-flesh hand of his before it hits blade, before it is cut up as well. he's too little, too late, but he stuffs his fingers into the palm of shirou's hand all the same and tugs it away from the network of swords that poke through his injuries. the blood, in this volume, doesn't make him as woozy, but the feel of it pooling - warm and slick - forces him to lower his head for a moment, tucking his face between his knees.
he doesn't let go of shirou's hand. ]
Don't... make it twice, then. [ what the HELL is this kid ] I need you around.
[ juno tugs on shirou's hand, trying to draw his attention. trying to drag him out of his own head. ]
I've known a lot of people who've... died and gotten hurt, I don't want that happening to you. Not on my watch.
[ 'killed', though. now he looks painfully uncomfortable ]